


Thorns Remain When Roses Die

by DontSaveTheHero



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, Because that's how he always ends up, But he is, Mentions of "Rose", POST-Angels Take Manhattan, Rose Tyler is dead, The Doctor shouldn't be alone like this, The Ponds are gone, sad fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-29
Updated: 2014-04-29
Packaged: 2018-01-21 05:40:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1539674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DontSaveTheHero/pseuds/DontSaveTheHero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One beat. <br/>“Rose Tyler is dead.”<br/>Another beat.<br/>“No.”</p>
<p>After the Ponds have gone and Eleven is alone, he returns to a time where he met someone who would forever be seared onto his hearts, no matter how many regenerations he went through. A strangely familiar face appears, bearing news that couldn't come at a worse time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thorns Remain When Roses Die

The familiar whooshing sound of a type 40 TARDIS filled the dark alley way, somehow going unnoticed by the British pedestrians who walked on the pavement only a few meters away. The blue doors opened slowly, with none of the enthusiasm that the bow-tied man who walked out usually displayed. He took an unnecessary amount of time closing and locking the doors before venturing slowly in the direction of the nearest streetlight.

The changes in his normally childish character were clearly visible, and somewhat unsettling. His eyes had lost their bright quality, making the Time Lord look closer to his actual age. His mouth was turned neither up in a smile nor down in a frown; instead, the lips, combined with the other lines on his face, gave him a tired expression. There was a deep, unspoken sadness emitting from his very being.

He walked down the street without so much as glancing at anyone else. When the building barely a block away exploded suddenly, the sky illuminated with dangerous flames, he merely looked up and watched the fire spread as others ran by him in a frantic manner.

The Time Lord released a quiet sigh, no longer walking, only watching, with what could only be reminiscence, and maybe regret, in his eyes.

“I _knew_ I'd find you here.”

For a few long moments, the Time Lord said not a word, the raging fire dancing in irises of brown. It was almost as if he were so lost in thought he hadn't heard the statement.  Said in that accent, so strangely familiar but somewhat wrong in his ears. Because it was his voice, but not really.

“You're not supposed to be here,” he finally said quietly, more than a hint of accusation clear in his words.

Slowly, almost hesitantly the Doctor turned around and faced the source of the other voice. The man he faced was so shockingly similar but so strangely different that for the briefest second, a flash of interest might have  appeared on the Doctor's face, only to be quickly concealed with gloom.

It was a face he had seen in the mirror, years ago,  the face of another man who also called himself the Doctor. Who shared his memories, the good and the bad, even the bittersweet ones that sat right in the middle. 

But this face, the one staring at the Eleventh Doctor, had changed. The gray in his hair was visible at the roots, and age lines and wrinkles littered the older-looking skin. There was still that silent pain, a little understanding of sadness that resided in the very human eyes. One heart beat in this other man'  chest , this  _real_ man's chest-  one of the things left unchanged after  the real Doctor had left him, standing on a beach in a world that couldn't breach this world any longer. 

“You _can't_ be here,” the Doctor said again, when the human Doctor only looked at him without giving an explanation.

“And yet, here I am,” the other replied, and even the voice had gotten so much older. 

The Time Lord's eyes filled with fury at the other's calm attitude. Fury, fueled by sadness and anger and regret and loss and guilt that on any other occasion might have left him wondering who was the more human of the two.

“You just _left_ Rose there, then? You just left _Rose Tyler_ in Pete's World, did you? _Alone?”_ Eleven said with the most malice he could muster, the accusing tone even more apparent in every growled word.

One beat. 

“Rose Tyler is dead.”

Another beat.

“No.”

That one word, the only thing that Eleven could say, came out strangled. Full of denial. Still accusing.

“You've lost someone recently, Doctor.” A not-question said by a not-Time Lord yet with the same broken spirit. “That's why you're here, now, trying to remember what it was like. That moment when you grabbed her hand, no idea who she was or how her very existence was going to change yours. Ours. And the very first thing we said to her was-”

“Stop.” It wasn't a demand. It was full of pleading, heart-break, _begging._ Tears rolled down the Doctor's face even before he hid it in his hands, before his knees started shaking and his legs started to give away only for him to be caught by just as shaky arms. 

The human Doctor allowed the Time Lord to sob against his shoulder for a few minutes before he whispered a question. “What was their name, Doctor? The one you just lost?”

“Pond,” the other choked out. “Amelia and Rory Pond.”

“I'm sorry.”

“An...and Rose? How did she...?”

“Thought we were headin' off to calm down some startled little thing that'd managed to land itself on Earth. Turns out there's daleks in Pete's world, too. We weren't expecting...” the human seemed unable to continue, though his eyes remained clear of tears.

“I shouldn't have-”

“I didn't come here to blame you, Doctor. I don't, and she wouldn't. You deserved to know, and that's it. I know you. I know how much guilt you feel _without_ her name added to that list. So don't add it. For Rose.”

Eleven's entire body shook, but he was quiet, until he said, “I am so _old._ ”

The human Doctor pulled at the other until they looked each other in the eyes, different in appearance but full of the same emotions, the same memories. “Yet there's so much more for you to do, Doctor. So don't waste time, stuck in your past. It doesn't do you any good. Go find someone and share the universe with them. Because you're never replacing Rose Tyler, or Amelia and Rory Pond, or Martha Jones, Donna Noble, Captain Jack Harkness, and everyone who came before them. You're remembering them in the best possible way.”

Eleven gave a slow, hesitant nod, pulling away fully and making a valiant attempt at holding himself up. “The old girl's parked just a bit away. You could join me for a few trips, if you'd like.”

“No,” the human shook his head. “I didn't just come here for you, Doctor. I came here because I couldn't bare to live in a world where Rose Tyler is dead. I'd like to stay here. Because seeing her alive, even if from a distance, is so much better than seeing her name on that gravestone again. And besides, you need someone who keeps you from thinking too much about yourself. I'd hardly make the cut.” He almost managed a tiny smile. Just a twitch of the lips, but seeing the involuntary gesture of even the slightest bit of happiness made the Time Lord's heavy hearts just a little bit lighter.

Eleven nodded, then looked back at the still-burning building. “At this point, he's got no idea how lucky he is.”

“He'll figure it out quick enough. We might be a tad slow, but she's the no-nonsense type. And it'll be some of the best years of our lives.”

“Should probably move the TARDIS. Don't want him mistaking it for his.”

The two alien men looked at each other again and shook hands, neither trying to hide the pain that was killing them inside.

“Goodbye, Doctor.”

“Goodbye, Doctor.”

The Time Lord turned around rather than spun in the way he so often did, and headed back towards his home. The human went the other way, heading off to start his new life in a world that would never feel quite right, even if the comfort of knowing his love was alive would always keep him here.

Soon, the type 40 TARDIS disappeared from the dark alley way with the same noise that had occurred when it arrived. It left an entirely empty space, carrying away the sad, broken man who had collapsed on the floor inside, much too alone and far too damaged to pick himself back up.

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback, critiques, comments, etc. are all very much appreciated. I'm also open to writing prompts or just plain old conversations on Tumblr: http://dontsavethehero.tumblr.com/


End file.
